How to woo a lady (For shy guys)

There are no hard and fast rules on how to start a conversation. Spontaneous, witty and humorous lines work all the time. Talk smart, be original – these are the basics.

Bear in mind that first impression matters much – there is love at first sight as there is love at first speech. The first sentence you utter, the gesture that goes with it, can determine if he or she would give you the desired feedback. Your opening sentence when you start a conversation with the opposite sex is called a pick-up line. It sets the atmosphere for the conversation. If you are able to catch her off guard and make her smile or laugh really hard, you are 60 percent close to home base.

In a bid to be poetic, some men go as far as cramming lines from novel or Songs of Solomon in the Bible. Some even buy books for ‘romantic words’ but yet at the end of the day, they fumble and bungle their efforts.

Funnily, in this jet age, some men still use the old-and-worn-out way of approaching ladies in their first encounter. Such ineffective efforts ranges from jaded lines such as “Hi, you look familiar, do I know you from somewhere?” to poorly poetic rhetoric like “An angel is missing in heaven, please call heaven and tell them you are ok,” and puerile approach of saying “do you live in this area, ’seems I know you.” Some will get your contact from anywhere, call you up, and address you with a different name. Once you claim it is a wrong number and drops the call, he will call back and sings you a hymn of how he loves your voice. From there, he wants to know your real name. You know the rest.

Some men could be very daring and embarrassing too. Their pick-up lines, very offensive, could be something like “Baby oku, idi okay, I want you.” Or “baby how much are you worth, I want to take you away.” This comes more from my Igbo brothers, (Umu-nna)

Young men who just left the four walls of university are usually the one who are still finding it very difficult to get perfect pick-up lines. Their gambit could be like “baby, I saw you from afar and decided to navigate towards your nomenclature, are you residential in this area?”

Men who want to smartly approach a lady that caught their fancy must first of all build their self confidence. Ladies don’t bite! We are also humans and we have feelings too. I wonder why some men would have their hearts in the mouth each time they think of meeting the girl they love. What is the worst that could happen? She won’t hit you nor call you names. Well, it depends on your manner of approach.

A simple way to start is by saying ‘Hi’. It is ok to shore up your morale and self confidence. Even when you stammer in the process, don’t worry some women are very patient (especially when they know you want to compliment or woo them); they would wait for you to land.

Love starts with ‘Hi’ and could lead to a serious relationship or even marriage. It is all about the mind-set. Relationships feed on god communication. With good communication, love finds expression and establishes connection. The birth, buoy and bane of any good relationship boil down to steady and effective communication. Painfully, some men and women lost tracks of their Mr. and Mrs. Right because of lack of the right words to say. And they might not even have a second chance to make it right.

I was seated in my office the other day when I received a call on my phone. The harsh manner with which I spoke to the caller was noticed by one of my colleagues. He told me I would someday ‘talk’ away my future husband. I laughed but I thought about it. He was very correct. But for crying out loud why would a man who doesn’t know you from Adams just call you and starts pestering you for details of your house address; as if that wasn’t enough, he insists you come and meet him at a particular hotel if you don’t deem it convenient to give your residential address.

Sometimes, ladies raise their fence so high that any guy who is not confident enough will easily get intimated and run short of words after the first introductory words. Some typical Nigerian babes are just bent on embarrassing some guys. They would be like, the last time he spoke to me, he almost bite his lips, let him dare come close and talk to me again if he is a man.

But wait a minute! He was smattering and didn’t make any sentence right. And you think you are at the top of your game? Sister, you must as well have lost the best husband in the world. Here is food for thought: Not less than 80 percent of the very spontaneous, sharp, fluent and sugar-coated tongue men are players.

Like the lyrics of African China’s songs, “if you love somebody walk up to her and tell am you love am,” there is no easier DIY or a How-To formulae. Nevertheless, here are some funny pick up lines for guys who want to use humour to get their partner: “See my friend over there; he wants to know if you think I am cute.” “Do you believe in love at first sight?” “People call me Peter, but you can call me tonight.”

You can get your own sweet and romantic pick-up lines. Don’t be left behind.

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